Horner Kevin - Horner’s Corner

You'll find that most people are in some way irrational, even superstitious. They may be "superficially" superstitious and base their behaviors on things that have no basis in reality. They may be literally superstitious and think that some action or inaction will irrationally effect their desired results.

Uncovering someones irrational belief is easier that you might think. Simply observe and you'll see it.

You can also test it out.

What would happen if you could uncover their irrational belief and use it as a tool to drive their thoughts and actions? You would be using their "map" of the world to influence them. That's true mind control.

To influence someone in this way, it's important to just assume that people have some irrational fear, belief or superstition. Then uncovering those fears, beliefs and superstitions is all a matter of just observing and asking yourself "Does this persons response have a logical origin?" What you'll find is that answer is almost always "No."

Most people will in fact behave according to events based on automatic reactions that are completely irrational. They often do this because that reaction has worked for them in the past... sometimes only ONCE, but it's enough for them to conclude that it's the best response they have.

Other people will be more overt with their superstitions and demonstrate what Karl Jung called a "complex" in which strong emotions are triggered automatically as if they were programmed to respond this way by trauma. Guess what? It's very likely they were!

Begin to look at peoples behaviors and run them through the "irrational belief" filter and you'll see just how often this behavior occurs.

You can test it by simply asking their opinion in a “what would do” type of fashion. Most people love to believe that you value their opinions and will tell you eagerly.

To take advantage of this new information see what you can do to use it to influence them your way. You can do this by presenting them an two options one of which would trigger this irrational belief.

In most cases it's always best to only point out the irrational belief to them as a last resort of influencing them.

Regardless of how you use this new insight you'll always seem much wiser than you are if you act unaffected and "above it all" as if you are wise, compassionate and filled great wisdom based on a rich life experience.

Our parents didn’t tell us this. Our teachers didn’t tell us this. Our older siblings didn’t tell us this. We didn’t even hear it from our first employers. What is this? That in anything we do we must start out by failing. Anthony Robbins expains the success cycle this way, "Success is the result of good judgment, good judgment is a result of experience, experience is often the result of bad judgment."

There is no truer formula for life. Heck, they should make this the first thing we learn in grammar school. If you think about it, it is the first thing we learn in life. We didn’t just start talking after we were born. We came into the world crying. Then we graduated to a bunch of unintelligent murmurs and garbles until we said our first word. It was at that moment in life we also received a greatest encouragement from our parents. “Look at little Johnny, he said his first word. Come here daddy and listen. Ok Johnny say it again. Oh here it comes, Ma ma! Isn’t that great” Even though dad wanted to hear his name first, he joins in on the accolades, “Great job Johnny!” Every one claps. The parents brag to everyone they know that their son has just learned his first word.

If you think about it, we had to fail about several thousand times before we uttered an intelligent sound.

It was that same way when we learned to walk. We fell a whole bunch of times. But our parents egged us on by holding our hands up in the air and dragging us across several hundred miles of rug space until we could walk our first step ourselves. Unsure of what our parents saw, they put us up on our feet and encouraged the heck out of us telling us, ‘”Come on Johnny &ndash you can do it!” Finally that day came when we hobbled along like a drunken sailor and our parents yelled out “He did it. Johnny is walking!” They showed us off to everybody they knew, and we were expected to do our newly learned trick of walking.

In everything we do in life, a certain amount of failure should be expected before we get it right. I remember my experience at learning how to ride a bike. I even remember how old I was when I did. I was seven years old. This was a big adventure for me because little did I know it at the time but my bicycle would take me around a few thousand miles of exploration throughout my next seven years of life. My older brother helped me out with realizing my first bruises. I had training wheels fixed to my bike which my dad put on, and my brother held me up with one arm on the bike handles in front and one arm on the seat where I was seated which at the time seemed really high off the ground. My father stood at the bottom of the hill like a catcher for the New York Yankees waiting for the pitch to come in. Then that moment my brother yearned for with so much enthusiasm came, he hurled me into space with glee and as destiny would have it I fell for the first time scraping my knees and my hands and I laid there on the ground crying. My brother laughed but I remember my father’s encouraging words, “Come on Johnny, you can do it!” So I tried again and again. Luckily I did not have to fail as much as my earlier experiences in life. I think I only fell a dozen times or so before that bicycle took me for my first breath-taking ride down that long hill and I steered it into my first successful stop myself after steering it and learning to keep my balance as I tacked in and out of the wind left and right, left and right.

As we get older, our challenges become bigger as we learn new things, and failure is always to be expected. Why is that we are so hard on ourselves when we fail? Failure is a part of life. It must come as the sun must rise each day. Unfortunately, as we get older, life becomes crueler as we meet more unsavory and troubled people. These characters put us down and that is why a positive reinforcement system at home is so vital. But when that home environment becomes dysfunctional as it does with so many families, the encouragement we need is lost. In fact, in many cases our own dysfunctional family contributes to our negative experiences as they become our critics and antagonists instead of constructively encouraging us like we need.

When we are constantly told we can’t make it, and we are stupid, and the hugs and affection disappears more and more regularly, our world becomes full of negative reinforcement.

But cheer up because we now know what to expect. Failure will come with everything we do. What should we do when we encounter failure? My wife gave me a great illustration. “It’s like surfing”, she said. “When the big waves come and they are larger than we expect, we can’t expect ourselves to keep standing. We must squat down or even kneel on the surf board as we encounter the wave. But once it passes we can stand up again, regain our balance and wait for the next wave.”

When we learned how to speak, learned how to walk, learned how to ride a bike, or learned how to swim it was always the same thing. We ducked when the punches came but we got right back up again didn’t we?

Toni Robbins said experience comes from poor judgment (or making mistakes). That is a natural part of the success cycle. Today as you take on the world, remember the natural success cycle. It always begins with failure; but with experience will come success.

Time management is essential to managers and business people, it is clear that the average manager has to deal with many issues and that this is the world of cutthroat competition. When a businessman or a manager can not outpace a competitor they will always be the slowcoach of the success bandwagon. Time management skills are needed not only to confront and beat competition but also to provide a manager a better schedule and some quality time so she is more focused and relaxed when working, this is why time management skills have to be at its best. A good use of time management will automatically catapult you to the forefront of the rat race. Time management is an important and unavoidable corner of the total management quadrant.

Time management has shifted from the traditional management concepts to a more modern and up to date version of management with the rising consciousness about time management it has easily entered the sphere of total management. So if you lack in time management skills you will always lag behind in the high rising competition. Remember, procrastination is not going to help. Today’s manager does not have a lot of options, to manage time in a perfect way should also be an aspiration since it is clear that not using time optimally will cost a client, a market or a whole business.

Even if you are a big hot guy there are people who would be eyeing your position. They might be doing their best to overthrow you and jump into your chair. You can only keep them at bay if you learn to keep your time in binds. Plan your tasks, organize your work, set priorities and be firm on your goals. Follow your schedule regime but keep it flexible enough for unforeseen demands of time and you'll see your hard work bring good benefits.

Good Time management ultimately means that you will have higher productivity and in a natural way you will also see a steady grow of your business. Time management can do wonders to your financial health, a wise time manage timetable will create a clear schedule to work by, and will allow you and your partners to perfect your working protocols and working methods. You will never have to lose a contract because you missed out on deadlines.

Time management is more like a general theory that you need to adopt, it does not mean that you have to go for doing everything you can possibly do in the shortest time available, but doing right things at the right time in right way, an orderly and well plan work plan and working methods. So doing things in the right way on its own enhances the quality of your work along with productivity. Both these factors lead to a cost benefit that is unsurpassable.

In the next article we will go in deeper into the way you should implement and practice time management, I hope that this information increased your knowledge of better time management.

Bipolar disorder is also known as manic depression. Bipolar disorder is a psychological disorder that effects a person's mood. The mood swings are very extreme with a manic (high elation) phase and a very deep depressive phase. There is estimated to effect approximately 1% of the adult population. There is also evidence that shows that neither men nor women have a greater chance of suffering from bipolar disorder than the other. Bipolar is the third most common disorder after major depression and dysthymic disorder (a mild but persistent form of depression). Because of the extreme psychological disturbances caused by bipolar disorder, it can destroy lives. Alcohol and drug problems are often present in sufferers and without proper medication and care, it leads to 20% of sufferers committing suicide.

Many people experience a depressive phase most of the time, while only experiencing very few manic episodes. It is the swing between moods that people find hardest to deal with. Although no one would care to feel deeply depressed.

There is no cure for bipolar disorder and it is a life-long condition that often needs to be controlled with medication. Lithium is used to help control mania phases of people who suffer from bipolar disorder. Bipolar often begins in adolescence or early adulthood, and continues throughout life. Bipolar disorder is very seldom diagnosed in people who are 40 years old and above.

Types of Phases

Although it is generally accepted that bipolar disorder alternates the sufferers mood between mania and depression, the American Psychiatric Association has identified four different moods that are experienced in varying degrees of intensity and length, or not at all.

Depression - typical depression from a lack of motivation or interest in anything including eating to thoughts and attempts at suicide.

Mania - often begins with an elated or euphoric feeling. can also cause a sufferer to feel angry and irritable.

Hypomania - a milder form of mania where the person feels good and feels they are becoming more productive with their life.

Mixed mood - a mixed episode is characterised by experiencing feelings of mania and depression all in the same day.

Symptoms of Bipolar Disorder

Bipolar disorder symptoms are disturbances or abnormality of moods with the sufferer alternating between a manic phase and a depressive phase repetitively.

Depressive Phase Symptoms

Very deep negative moods often with thoughts or attempts at suicide.

Eating disorders.

No interest in activities enjoyed in the past.

None or very little interest in sex.

No self esteem.

Sleeping problems high an low.

Feeling guilty.

Manic Phase Symptoms

Excessive high or euphoric feelings along with many grand or over-ambitious ideas or plans.

Excessive amounts of energy.

Unnaturally high self-esteem and self-belief.

Increased sex drive which may lead to promiscuity and aggressive sexual behaviour.

Extreme irritability and easily distracted.

Alcohol and drug abuse, usually cocaine and sleeping medication.

Little need for sleep.

Manic phase lasts at least one week.

I visited the ruins of a Roman camp, the other day that was start the ball rolling in a engaging valley in the mesial of an island.

The setting was idyllic, sheltered from the winds and not too away from the duct superstore burgh, it seemed an paradigm smidgin to homestead and bring up a family.

Its summary was thoughtfully provided on signs around the ruins of a stout quarters, which had been expanded in Roman times to embody a fervid and cold bathroom and mosaic floors. All of this was damned interesting and a tidy investment in support of the landowner. But the encampment was wanton, and it occurred to me that there had to be a good reason since it was unclouded that someone had put a caboodle of trouble and investment capital into their dream.

I wondered if Vikings, who were known to be active in this area after the Romans formerly larboard, had attacked it but there were no signs of charred cube occupation or the aftermath of battle.

Looking on all sides another representation revealed the problem. There had been more than one have to settle the block, but the real estate formed a simpleton point of drainage for the hills there, and continuous buildings had each eventually succumbed to subsidence.

I was fist in no doubt that the buildings were of a moral calibre and that the builders were able at construction, but undoubtedly it had taken a few generations to work exposed that this was not a suitable plot in behalf of construction. If we quite wanted to subside this right today we would induce piles deep into the justification to overthrow the subsidence.

The tip that this drove into my judgement was that of developing software. It is all too often the case that Software maturing organizations and their customers prepare the unchanging mistakes over again. If the foundations are shaky then there is no facet in erection, but with a meagre plotting someone command could solve the quandary and provide a safe velocity of delivering a solicitous foundation.

The biggest misstep that organizations make is to pother to abstract corpus juris before they show compassion for the pretty pickle they are solving. That doesn't through you have to be complacent and that sitting round in a few meetings last wishes as clear up all your problems.

What should be done is: -

Nimbus fence what you know.
Fillet unaligned what you don't know.
Build compensate undeviating you are developing the goodness product.
Body the software that you recall resolution not change.
Curb that what you are building is what is wanted.

Commonly the customer exactly doesn't know verbatim what they want, so you need to concern them in the progress process. The earlier they influence to know the goods then the more like as not they are to swallow into the solution.
Having said all of that..

Lex non scripta 'common law should be built where it enhances the opinion of the uncontrollable both to the person and the worldforfree.net.

Being confident means not exhibiting that blushing redness when confronting people. It means that, when you are in front of a crowd all red and blushing, you do not wish that the floor would open and eat you up. You want to exude that confidence and bid goodbye to blushing. Make it a thing of the past and be more assertive when facing other people.

Literally and traditionally, blushing means being modest or bashful. It also means displaying that marked redness on one’s face. Blushing is associated as a result of shame, embarrassment, or modesty. It should be notable differently to flushing, which is a more intense state, extending over to the body and does not have a mental source. Blushing that persists for longer periods is believed to be an early sign of rosacea, while that fear associated to blushing is called erythrophobia or other wise known as pathological blushing.

Blushing, in more recent definitions, are a result of sexual anticipation and/or enlargement of erogenous zones. This condition is also seen to be exhibited more among younger generations. Blushing regions may be different in structures in every individual, because others may have wider capillary loops and vessels in their facial skin, particularly the cheeks and this area is also marked to have lesser vasoconstrictors. This means that greater vasodilation in these areas, thereby causing the blush on the face.

One great way to control blushing is through hypnosis. It works on relieving that part of your mind that causes you to blush. It gets you to the very source of your blushing, and resolve whatever needs to be settled. Because all that we are and all that we feel are in the sub-conscious mind, this is where hypnosis works. It strikes that part of your sub-conscious mind and changes it in direction, giving it the much needed boost to feel and live more confident.

Harnessing the power to control your sub-conscious mind is not easy, but once you get the hang of it, your blushing is treated with speed and effectiveness. That is why hypnosis is called the brief therapy. It likewise teaches you to feel relaxed and comfortable getting the results that you want not just treating your blushing condition.

How marvelous it would be not to worry anymore about blushing. Make it a thing of the past with increased confidence and bid blushing bye-bye.

I haven’t got time to relax &ndash really? Have you got time not too?

Being able to relax is important to achieving optimal performance and health. You name it; being relaxed will increase your productivity in it. If you're not relaxed, everything you do will be a struggle. Relaxation provides mind-body integration necessary for peak performance.

It is important to relax to get your mind clear and your body tension free; to regain focus and to cool down and to help return to a balanced physical state. Relaxation is vital for a healthy mind and is required to maintain motivation and interest in our lives and careers. Not being able to relax and unwind can be damaging to your health. Even when there are huge demands on your life, you may have a large family, an important career, and a home amongst your other weekly commitments - it is still necessary to find your own time and space to relax.

It is very important that throughout the day we find time to relax. Twenty minutes, two or three times a day, is preferred. If you can’t manage twenty minutes, it’s important to realise that whatever amount of time you do manage to get to relax will be beneficial to your mind and body, even if not noticeably so.

When time is short there are a number of things you can do: reading, writing, daydreaming or just sitting quietly. Quite often what ever you do to relax will be personal and work for you, so you need to find what works best.

As a Life Coach I have worked with numerous people with issues relating to relaxation and stress etc. It’s interesting that initially many find it difficult to slow down and see the benefits of taking more time out. However after a few weeks and a couple of life coaching sessions focused on this area, and a bit of commitment on their part, most change their ways and wax lyrical about the benefits to their lives.

Some of the common benefits of relaxation are:

• It improves your ability to concentrate. It will help you in your ability to tune out distractions and gives you better sensory awareness.

• It improves body awareness; you need to know when you are under or over doing it.

• It speeds up healing time following an injury and fatigue, the body needs to recover fully if it’s going to perform at an optimal level in the near future.

• Learning is enhanced, it is much easier to introduce new thoughts and ideas when your mind is clear and you are relaxed. Skills are best learned when you are in a relaxed state and there is an absence of tension.

• It helps you sleep better

• You become more efficient

• It puts your focus back on the present and gives you a sense of control

• It increases energy

If you don’t take the time to unwind and relax regularly, you might be putting not only your own health and well-being at risk but also that of others as well.

In relation to your responsibility to the health and safety of others; we only have to think of driving a car, or operating machinery, and how our ability to do these tasks diminishes when we are tense, tired and stressed. So in fact our responsibility to relax is not just for our own sake but also for that of others.

With regards to our own health and emotional well-being, if we don’t make time to relax regularly we are putting our health and mental health at risk of failure. Some of the effects of lack of relaxation are below:

• Headache, common ones being tension headaches and migraines. Controlling tension and relaxing can help migraines. Tension headaches are susceptible by definition to treatment by relaxation.

• Chronic fatigue, your body is in a total sate of fatigue. You suffer from total lack of energy and motivation all of the time.

• Cardiovascular disorders, high blood pressure and heart disease, heart attack.

• Gastrointestinal problems, diarrhoea, constipation and stomach ulcers as well as indigestion and heartburn.

• Poor immune system, becoming susceptible to illness

Early warning signs that we need to have a break and relax are:

• Yawning/sighing

• Lack of concentration

• Feeling the urge to stretch and move about

• General drop in performance

• Feelings of stress and irritability

• Performing uncommon errors

• Tiredness

If we are aware of the signs and take notice of them and take a break etc, you could avoid a lot of stress and fatigue, you will be more rational and focused, and better equipped to carry on, and be far healthier.

Spending a lifetime of ignoring the signs could impact heavily, not only on your health, well-being and happiness but also those around you. Relationships could suffer as well as your career. On a personal note, the consequences of not taking time to relax over a lifetime could mean you pay the ultimate price.

You say you don’t have time to relax. I say you don’t have time not too. You are your own best resource; you need to take time to nurture and look after yourself.

In the 37 years that I have been counseling individuals, I have worked with many people who have suffered from severe physical, emotional, and/or sexual abuse in childhood. Many who have sought my help were suffering from fear and anxiety, depression, various addictions, relationship problems and sexual problems. Many of these people had no memory of their childhood and had no idea why there were so unhappy. Many had spent years in therapy yet had never remembered their abuse.

The reason they could not remember the traumatic events of their childhood is because the child or children within, who suffered the abuse, did not feel safe in revealing the abuse. These unconscious inner parts were protecting the person from reliving the horrible pain of the past. These inner children knew that the adult self did not have the strength to learn about and manage the information and the feelings.

In order to remember and heal traumatic events from the past that are affecting you today, you need to have a strong and loving Adult self who is capable of managing emotional pain. Without this loving inner Adult, you may get so flooded and overwhelmed with the feelings of traumatic memories that you cannot function.

The gentle, transformational Inner Bonding process that we teach is a process for developing this strong, loving Adult self. The loving Adult is the aspect of us that is connected with a powerful and loving Source of spiritual guidance &ndash whatever this is for you. Learning and practicing the Inner Bonding process develops your ability to connect with your personal Source of spiritual guidance. It is your connection with your guidance that gives you the strength to manage the intensely painful feelings of childhood abuse.

Once the inner children who hold the memories feel safe that there is a loving Adult self who is capable of managing the feelings, you will start to remember your past. As these memories come up, you will begin to understand the conclusions you drew about yourself that are currently causing your pain. Almost all children who have been abused draw erroneous conclusions about themselves as a result of the abuse &ndash false beliefs such as, “I’m not important.” “I have no worth.” “I am just an object for others’ use.” “I am not lovable.” “I should never have been born.” “I would be better off dead.” “I don’t deserve love.” “I am a bad person.” It is these beliefs that are causing your present pain.

Healing from childhood abuse is not just about remembering the past. It is about remembering the very good reasons you had for drawing the conclusions that are currently causing you such pain. It is about gently and lovingly acknowledging what happened that led to your present beliefs that are now limiting you. It is about learning how to access the truth from your spiritual source so that you can move out of lies that you are telling yourself that are causing your current pain.

Most of us learn to treat ourselves based on how we were treated and how our parents or caregivers treated themselves. When your parents abused you, they were also not taking loving care of themselves and were not role modeling loving self-care. As long as you treat yourself the way your parents or other caregivers treated you and themselves, you will suffer. Healing from childhood abuse is about developing your loving Adult self so that you can learn to treat your inner child or inner children the way you always wanted to be treated.

You CAN fully heal from childhood abuse, but only through learning to access and bring into your being the love, truth, wisdom and strength of your spiritual guidance. Through learning and practicing the Inner Bonding process, you will discover the incredibly beautiful and perfect essence within you &ndash the part of you that was never damaged by the abuse. This is your true Self that will emerge as you heal the false beliefs of your wounded self. This is what will happen as you develop your loving Adult self through learning and practicing the Inner Bonding process.

The remainder of Sunday was enjoyable. I have little trouble with weekends. It’s the time between weekends that sometimes gives me problems. All too soon Monday arrived. The ride to the office was taken up with reflections on the past few days. Although we realized we’d be seeing her again soon, June’s visit had been most welcome, but much too short.

Gideon still amazed and intrigued me. There was no doubt in my mind that he had access to considerable information and power. I accepted some of his concepts such as time travel as distinct possibilities, especially since I was a party to some of those journeys with him. But again, some of his ideas were difficult to reconcile as I struggled with my “reality thinking.”

As usual, I was the first one to arrive at the office. As I walked in turning on the lights, he was waiting for me, sitting on the chair across from my desk. “Gideon! Not you again!” I

exclaimed.

“It seems as if you’re getting bored with me, John,” he said with a twinkle in his eye.

“No, of course not,” I hastened to assure him.“Not bored, just amazed that you always appear at the strangest times.”

“That’s good to know. I came because I felt that you’re going to need to see a bit more clearly today. ”He did not smile this time and was more serious than I’d ever known him to be.

“What do you mean, Gideon?”

“You’re afraid,” he said, “for your employees, your family, your friends and others. You think you’ve done all you could to make things better and yet,you feel that you can’t see the light.”

“You seem to be reading my mind again, Gideon. What you say is true&ndashbut I’m only human.”

“Only human, John? Only human?”He was intense as he continued.“You use that as an excuse. You're much more than just human. You and everyone else are more divine than human. You were all created in the image and likeness of the First Force, the Almighty. Don’t you remember the numerous legends of creation?”

“Yes, of course. So what? I’m human or divine or both. It really doesn’t matter. I’m still concerned about myself and my people and because of my concern, I sometimes fear and tremble. Is it so terrible to care for others? Is it a sign of weakness to be concerned about your fellow human beings? What’s so terrible about that?”

“No, not the caring, John. The worrying is what gets you. You must make a distinction between caring and worrying. You care, so you try to make everything work right. When nothing seems to work right, you worry and become fearful and because of the fear, you short-circuit yourself.”

“In what way or manner,O Great One?”I asked somewhat sarcastically.

To read the rest of the story visit .spiritual-simplicity.com

Whether headache is the cause of tension or the tension is the cause of headache? Think over...if their origin is due to the common cause?

Well, the dividing line between tension and headache is thin.

The tension headache is the unique and generous gift of high paced life style of the modern world. Most of the people caught in the grip of this civilization are out to run an endless marathon that has no end. Many of these crazy run ups end on stretchers, ambulances and ICUs in the hospital. Tension headaches are directly responsible for this sorry state of affair.

What is the source of these tensions? An individual, on a normal working day is connected to his family, his friends and his office. Any serious tension in any of these places is the direct cause of their tension headache.

The causes of tension headache may be simple or complex. Your son's poor percentage in the higher secondary examination, and his inability to get admission in any of the reputed Colleges might become a major reason for your tension headache. Well, any kind of stress or worry could be the root of your tension. This is why tension headache is the most common form of headache.

Herein, the tension type headache is not to be confused with any of the serious forms of headache. Tension headache could be due to a single factor. The moment a solution is found to the problem, it disappears.

You may not need any treatment or medicine for this type of tension headache. This headache can be compared to the sharp, passing showers. It comes and it goes. But if you experience intense pain when you have such headaches, you need to consult your doctor immediately.

How to treat the tension headache? The correct treatment is to go to the root cause of the tension and treat that cause. When that cause is satisfactorily resolved, the headache is also gone.

And last but not the least, solving your tension headache through over the counter medications is neither the correct nor the recommended solution for it. At best, this can be described as a temporary solution. The effect of headache will reappear again.

So, learn to be at peace with yourself to treat this peculiar headache. Find a solution in the activities that pleasure you. You may read some lessons on right type of living as well. For, good literature many a times solves the riddles of tension.